summer's over :(

I think I can now officially say that summer is over. :( College is back in session and the warm weather is long gone (but then again it is the U.P. so it could be 90 degrees tomorrow!). It's been sweatshirts and pants for the last couple days and it feels like fall! I have to say I am kind of excited for fall, if only because Ryder has a ton of cute sweatshirts and some cute hats! :] This weather has gotten me thinking about Halloween and Christmas and, of course, Ryder's 1st birthday! Wow I cannot believe that he is almost ONE! I swear he was born just a month of two ago! Sometimes I just look at him trying to walk around in his big boy clothes and think "where's my little baby??" It doesn't help that I gave him his first haircut yesterday so he looks like a toddler now, not a baby! I wanted to wait until maybe November to cut his hair but it's so long and was always hanging in his eyes so I finally cut it. :( And, for the record, I do NOT know how to cut hair! John's hair is so thick and curly that if (I mean When) I make a mistake it's pretty much hidden. Not so with Ryder's hair! Oh well it was my first time cutting it and he was pretty squirmy as always :)
At the end of this month I am heading downstate with Ryder for about a week and I can't wait! Though that means that he will be one month closer to being one! hmmm... <3

whew!

Whoops I haven't written anything in a while! Must be because I've been so busy... or more like because Ryder has been so busy! I swear he gets into EVERYthing! He is steadily mastering the art of walking and with it causes more trouble than I ever could have imagined! Instead of buying baby gates (like I should have!) I have two chairs from our kitchen laying across the entrences to the kitchen and dining room from the living room. It's easy enough for John and I to step over but has always kept Ryder out. Until now. He has started to climb everything so one day he climbed the chair and landed face first in the kitchen. Ouch. He did that once more but then seemed to learn his lesson on that one. Now he simply pulls it away until he can crawl by. Hmm I never thought of that! When I first put them there he was just starting to crawl and it was so hard to imagine him being big enough to get by them. Well what do you know that day is here! So now I have more baby-proofing to do! Our house is now full of Ryder-traps: chairs pushed against the walls so he can't get at the outlets (he pulls the covers off because we have crooked old outlets), the toy box in front of the bathroom so he can't get at the toilet again (actually he just climbes over that but it's still there to give us a 2 second heads up before he goes over), my books packed to tightly that even I can't get them out on the top shelf of the bookcase (the bottom shelves hold his books, which he happily empties every day) etc. And STILL he manages to find stuff to get into! Everything in my house is on the verge of being banished to the second floor...oh wait on second thought he is forever tearing down the gate and making a break up the stairs anyway. No wonder I'm exhausted! I feel like all I do all day is chase after him! well I have to go...Ryder is trying to climb up my legs to get at the computer...!

ps any suggestions?!?

What a busy month it's been!

This July has been so incredibly busy! And yet it's only half over! My sister Jacey came to stay with us for three weeks this summer and I am so glad she came! I am so happy to be able to spend time with her again. I've missed her! I had big plans for the weeks she was here but most kind of fell through, as plans have a way of doing. But it has been so fun to just chat and hang out with her! She is so good with Ryder and has been such an incredible help since my miscarriage. I don't know what I'm going to do without her when she leaves! The house will feel so empty and I know that Rydes is going to miss being entertained by his Auntie Jacey! 4th of July weekend was a pretty busy weekend for us. John, Ryder, Jacey and I went to the Lake Linden fireworks on the 2nd, the parade on the 3rd followed by a picnic with the Hyrkas fam and then up to Copper Harbor on the 4th! We drove up Brockway Mtn. and walked around Copper Harbor. Then came the fireworks! They are so cool because they shoot them over the water and you have to look almost straight up to see them because they are right overhead. They are incredible! Of course Ryder slept through them (I don't know how, they were so loud!) as he has done with the last 3 firework shows we've been to (bridgefest, balloonfest, LL fireworks and then 4th of July). Ryder has been the busiest of us all. Just a couple days ago he stood on his own for the first time! For about ten heart-pounding(for me!) seconds! I was so excited and proud of him that I immediately called my mom to brag. She told me that he would be walking before I knew it. And what do you know, he took his first steps three minutes later! Jacey and I seriously screamed we were so proud!!! And that's not all. Just today he said his first words! (I KNOW!) We were at Wal-Mart and John was pushing the cart, which Ryder was sitting in. John turned away to look at an item on the shelf and Ryder looked right at him and very loudly and clearly said "Dada!" He then waited expectantly for a response. And a response he got! He has been babbling "dadada" for a while with some bababa's and motorboat sounds thrown in too but that was the first time he ever said it as an actual word. John's grin was from ear to ear :) I cannot believe how fast he is growing up! It is so amazing and a little scary; where has my baby boy gone? Even his personality has really took root and shows. He is such a busy little troublemaker! And his grins and kisses just melt my heart. I love my little guy! Now we are getting ready to go camping with the Kantolas. I've been waiting for this all summer and I'm so excited! If only the food would make itself, the house would clean itself, the car would pack itself, and the laundry would do itself! While I'm wishing I may as well wish for new carpet too... :]

Some bad news

As always, life has its ups and downs and I've had my share of both in the last couple of weeks. Finding out that I was expecting was so exciting. I could barely believe that I was going to soon be a mother of two! When you find out that you're pregnant you right away think of the end result, meeting that precious little baby in nine months. My pregnancy with Ryder was so trouble-free that I didn't even think anything could ever happen. So I was in total shock when I started bleeding. My heart literally jammed into my throat and my stomach dropped. I can't even begin to describe that feeling. The first thing I did was call my mom and I just started bawling. I know that it's not uncommon to bleed during a pregnancy but I just knew that something was wrong. Even just writing this I'm starting to tear up! I ended up going to the E.R. where they did an ultrasound. I felt so numb waiting for the doctor to come back with the results. John was thinking positive (as he always does :)...) but something felt wrong. When the doctor told us that we had lost the baby I started crying all over again. I kept thinking "I already knew it was going to be bad news so why am I reacting like this?" but to have my feelings confirmed meant that even the tiniest bit of hope that I had was now gone. I cried for the baby that had been lost and for the loss of the future that I had already started envisioning. Now, more than ever, I realize how blessed I am to have such a loving and caring family. If not for the support of my husband and mom and all my family and friends I would have been so lost in this trial. They have helped and are helping me accept my pain and move on. I know it's going to be a long journey. Being around people who are pregnant or just had a baby and hearing them talk about everything is really hard but I just smile because I truly am happy for them and I save my tears for later. I realize now what a miracle pregnancy really is and I know that I am so unbelievably blessed that God has given me such a wonderful son already. Ryder is a happy, healthy, growing little boy. What more can I ask for?

Ryder's going to be a big brother!

In February! We just found out and are so excited! The news got out a little sooner than I had planned but at least now I have an excuse for being so tired and cold all the time! It's actually a gorgeous day outside (the first one in a while) and here I am all bundled up in a sweatshirt, pants and slippers! It is so crazy to think that I will soon be a mother of two! Hopefully these nine months go by faster than last time. With Rydes moving around and getting into mischief I'm sure I will keep busy :) The little guy is now an expert crawler and is now trying to conquer walking along furniture, yikes! Seriously, he learned to crawl in like 2 weeks and then right away he started to stand up using furniture and now he's trying to walk along it. Wow!
Ryder's personality is really starting to show. He is such a ham! He loves to pose for the camera and he knows just when to give you a crinkle-eyed smile or a big slobbery kiss! He babbles all day long and always wants attention :) In my efforts to keep him entertained I've pulled out every trick in the book. Pots and pan, check. Hairbrush, check. Water bottles, hats, spoons and cell phones, check. The list goes on and on! His new infatuation is babies. Babies in magazines, babies in the store or in books. Even just the word "babies" is enough to set off the grins and giggles! So yesterday I put my seldom-used creative thinking cap and had an idea! I cut out pictures of babies from all my old parenting magazines and "laminated" them using clear packaging tape. And voila! His new favorite toy came into existence. So far today we've played with the babies, ate some banana puffs, splashed in the bath for like and hour, and talked ourselves silly. Now that's a day well spent!

nachos

Today I was eating lunch (nachos, yumm!) in the living room while Ryder was playing on the floor and our dog Toby was taking a nap on the couch. A couple chips in I happened to glance down and what do I see? Ryder and Toby side by side on all fours looking up at me hungrily, eyeing up my nachos. They just kept staring at me so I said loudly,"My nachos!" just to set the record straight. Toby barked. Ryder cried.

I ended up having to go give Toby some more dog food and having to comfort Rydes for a while. Needless to say my nachos were cold before I could finish them.

lets talk about funny stories

This one happened a while ago but I was just thinking about it today. One of the first times John, Ryder and I came downstate to visit after Ryder was born I was nursing Rydes in the living room and I had this conversation with one of my youngest brothers...
bro :"What's Ryder doing?"
me "ummm nursing"
bro: "what's that?"
me: "wellll um he's eating."
bro: "is he sucking on your tummy?"
me: "...um"
bro: "Oh! I know! He's sucking on your tummy because you forgot to bring his food!"
me: dies of hysterical laughter

another one that happened around the same time with the same little bro....
bro: "Is Ryder the same baby that was in your belly?"
me: "yep"
bro: "well how did you get him out?"
me: "well, uh. I, uh, went to the doctors." (I was all proud of myself for thinking up such a good answer at this point)
bro: "but then how did you get him out?"
me: "the doctors helped me?"
bro: "no but how?"
me: "umm go ask mom."
bro: "but Ryder is your baby, how did you get him out?"
me: "uh ask mom. Oh look an airplane!!!"
bro: "where?!?!"
me: "whew"